sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
