Are we in a gay sports bar?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
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