nut hugger
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
