We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
