He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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