Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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