Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
this hospital has no fireball
I smell like Dick and happiness
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
