You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
