can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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