is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
this will be a night to untag.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
