Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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