He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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