I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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