is wine microwaveable?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
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Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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