as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
My boob is missing a layer of skin
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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