can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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