I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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