idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize