are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
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Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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