going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
