I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
