And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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