I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
then he tried to convert me to islam
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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