I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Can I color on your dick again?
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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