doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize