After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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