In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
