butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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