At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I wish you could order shots online.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize