New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
