Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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