and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
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Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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