it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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