can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
