I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
