so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
