So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
