Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
