Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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