I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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