Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
