At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
