My sheets look like a crime scene.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Less talking, more tequila
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
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