I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize