Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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