i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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