"it" just moved
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
