he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
