He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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