If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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