i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
